4.1 Narrative Essay

Courtney Roome

Narrative Essay

Did you know that about 8 million Americans today have an eating disorder?  Did you also know that Americans spend over $40 billion on dieting and diet-related products each year (Smolak, 1996)? Eating healthy and living a healthy lifestyle is a big issue our society faces today.  Many people are not getting the proper education to be knowledgeable about the many diseases, and illnesses, as well as preventative techniques to avoid them.  Eating disorders are an example of one very serious condition that must be helped and treated otherwise death is at hands.

I am bringing up this issue to raise awareness to the public and advocating for more effective preventative health care education while children are young.  We need more health promotion and exercise activism in kids at a younger age to eventually stop their unhealthy habits, lifestyles, and thoughts!

When I was younger, about in 5^th I noticed my family start to have more problems and fight on a regular basis.  For most of it, I was kept in the dark, unaware about what is going on and why people were acting the way they were.  That spring, I went away on a vacation with my family to Florida where I first began to understand the rise of our family problems. 

It all happened after the flush of a toilet.  My parent’s were banging on the bathroom door, yelling for my sister to come out.  My dad escorted me into the kitchen, a little further away from the bathroom so he could talk to me in private. 

“Ashley is sick,” he told me.  I remember thinking, “Sick? How? What kind of sickness?”

My dad described to me that my sister had an illness of her body and mind, and that it is something very complicated and sometimes hard for others to understand.  At my young age, I did already know the basics about eating disorders, however not enough to have a full understanding of how and why it grew on my sister. 

Growing up in our childhood and adolescent years, Ashley and I had many ups and downs, however we always had each other’s backs no matter what.   It took Ashley a while to reach out to me and really speak to me about what is going on in her life and body.  It hurt my family and I to see what she was going through and not be able to help her or understand why. 

Ashley left home for a while too to seek treatment; sometimes weeks and sometimes months at rehabilitation centers, hospitals, and other care units.  We lost a lot of money going through all the expenses trying to make sure my sister was mentally stable and had a clear head on her shoulders.  It was actually ridiculous the amount of money we spent, as well as the amount of money that our insurance company would not cover, especially in dire time.  The estimated treatment of an eating disorder in the US ranges from $500 per day to $2,000 per day.  The average cost for a month of inpatient treatment is $30,000 (Mirasol, 2010).

It took Ashley over 8 years to get through some successful treatment and therapies.  To this day, she is still having inner struggles that only she knows how to handle.  Her illness and instability took a huge part out our family throughout the years.  We went through MANY rough times and difficulties that we are still working through.  Eating disorders are serious illnesses that can hurt not only the individual but families as well. There are many good therapeutic treatments out there for people living with eating disorders however it takes many years till full recovery, if that.  There should also be more preventative education on eating disorders for young girls and boys to make sure they are aware of the severity of the disorders and how it affects you and your loved ones. 

References:

ANAD. "General Information." National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders. 

     ANAD, 2011. Web. 19 Apr. 2011. <http://www.anad.org/get-information/about-eating-disorders/ 

     general-information/>. 

Mirasol. "Eating Disorder Recovery Centers." Mirasol. N.p., 2010. Web. 18 Apr. 2011.

<http://www.mirasol.net/eating-disorders/information.php>.

NEDA. National Eating Disorders Association. N.p., 2011. Web. 19 Apr. 2011. 

     <http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/information-resources/ 

     general-information.php#terms-definitions>. 

Pre writing 4.0

The climax of my narrative-

Specific example: when ashley's eating disorder started to tear apart my family. Specific fight or something that led to  a deeper understanding of how eating disorders affect not only the individual but family and friends as well.  Resources- Eating disorders should be helped sooner than later because if not can ruin families and individuals- very serious

Pre-writing 4.0

This is the pre-writing for my narrative argument.

I will be sharing my story of my sister and her eating disorder and how it came into and affected my life- and will give resources on the statistics and information about eating disorders.

Toilet flush froms guest room and my parents are banging on the door. I have no idea why everyone is so upset right now but I can tell that it is not good.  I was only probably 7 and did not understand much about health disorders or diseases that affect young women.
 Insert statistic- eating disorders make up for ____ population. __ girls and __ boys.

Reflection 2.3

I thought that the workshops really helped me with my paper.  They were very informative and helped me gain a better sense of what I needed to fix for my own paper.  I thought this paper was fun and creative and was interesting to see what the other students had written as it was to help them also.  Researching was easy for me because I was really interested in my topic of psychology and parenting styles so I was very much engaged with my writing as I could be.

Pre-writing 3.0

Rogerian Argument-


Discuss the issue vegetarian

Understand vegetarian lifestyle- was vegetarian for 2 years
However- needed to eat meat to be healthier at college. I understand it is wrong with the abuse.
Compromise- organic farms, no animal cruelty.

Essay 1.2

Courtney Roome

Academic Writing

Rhetorical Analysis

“Undocumented and Unafraid”

A Rhetorical Analysis of “Act would give education to undocumented youths”

Jessica Perez, the author of the Ithacan article written December 8^th 2010, “Act would give education to undocumented youths,” wrote about an Act called the DREAM act (The Development, Relief and Education for Alien Minors Act) and how in many ways it would be very beneficial towards America today.  This act would allow undocumented youths to be able to obtain a conditional permanent residency, which only lasts for 6 years, by either attending college or serving in the military.  Perez uses in this article logos and ethos to support her claim and enable political leaders as well as the public to understand how beneficial the DREAM Act could be in effect.

            A strong claim that Perez states is, “It is dangerous and irresponsible for such political leaders to ignore the advantages of our collective future because of restrictive thinking” (par. 30).  Perez discusses this issue of people in the Senate refusing to pass or even look at the act, one reason being the need for a better and stronger security system a the border.  One reason she states it is irresponsible to ignore the advantages of our future is because, “Congressional Budget Office recently released a series of economic estimates which shows that the DREAM Act would strengthen the U.S economy” (par. 3).  The evidence of this is that, “Enacting the bill would reduce deficits by about $1.4 billion over the 2011-2020 period.  Another study by the UCLA North American Integration and Development Center, estimates that the total earnings from the beneficiaries of the DREAM Act would be anything between $1.4 trillion and $3.6 trillion” (par. 3).  I think that Perez uses good supporting facts for her claim as well as uses logos to introduce these facts and numbers.  Having no previous knowledge of the DREAM Act, I think Perez could have introduced the Act more thoroughly to explain to her readers how this Act and all the beneficiaries really would benefit our economy.  She claims that the deficits would reduce billions of dollars over the next decade, however I feel as though that it is a very vague statement and if I were trying to grab my audience’s attention I would be making sure they understood how the U.S economy would change if this Act were to be passed and effective.  I also think that Perez is not targeting her audience well.  She is mostly speaking on behalf of the political leaders and people in the senate and what they are doing wrong instead of targeting her peers and other individuals that are reading the article.  Since she is writing in the Ithacan, Cornell and Ithaca students as well as other individuals are more inclined to read it; therefore she should be educating her audience on the Act and what they can do to help the situation.

            Perez also discusses how the effort to pass the DREAM Act is still an on-going battle.  She states that there are many efforts including hunger strikes, marches, and civil disobedience demonstrations that are being planned and implemented by undocumented youths.  Perez uses pathos in this paragraph to get across the vigorous and continuous efforts of undocumented youths fighting for certain rights.  This effort put forth by undocumented youths is also explained to be very dangerous because they put themselves at risk of deportation by exposing the fact that they are illegal immigrants.  Perez states, “They chant ‘undocumented and unafraid,’ and they continue to fight for their dreams and the dreams of the 2.1 million youths who live in uncertainty’ (par. 4).  These statements portray a portion of what undocumented youths go through in their lives and the struggles they go through to achieve their goals and desires.  They are explained to the readers using pathos by sharing their personal hardships and battles undocumented youths face.

            It is uncertain and unclear what the occasion is in this article, besides raising awareness of the Act, Perez states in the second paragraph, “A vote is expected for the DREAM Act in both the House of Representatives and in the Senate this week.”  This statement is very unclear and does not provide the reader with enough information about the “expected vote” and how it would affect the Act.

            In this article, Perez uses good evidence to support her claim that this should not be something that is put on the back burner but should be discussed and worked on.  However she targets her audience more towards political leaders rather than the public and how people can help the situation.  This article also provides a good amount of information about the effort undocumented youths are putting forth, and the estimates on potential money saved and gained.  I think that there also could be more support with the information given on the DREAM Act and where it stands today, and how the public can help.

           

        Article: Act would give education to undocumented youths 

2.1 Reflection

Through writing the first draft of the paper, I often got stuck with what exactly my claim was that I was rebutting and making sure that the rest of my essay supported it.  I liked doing the research because psychology and parenting is something I am interested in, however it was also hard to find scholarly articles that supported the idea I wanted.  I wished that I asked for help earlier with fully understanding the format however there were a few obstacles I went through in my physical and mental health that affected my day-to-day.